The Weekend Seminar

I assess the situation one more time, remembering that it is easy to overlook the obvious. Yes, he's definitely dead. Did I kill him? Indeed I did. Well, I'm glad that's over with. Let's move on. How do I go about getting the body out of my house?

You see? I'm already onto the next thing. In many situations, people will spend too much time on one subject, unable to move on in life. The same situation described earlier could happen to a number of people, but not everybody reacts in the same manner. Some may stare in disbelief at the dead body while still gripping the knife or, in some cases, the vial which once held poisonous poison. Our mission here is to bring total cognisance to our patients, to keep them completely aware and ready for the next obstacle in life.

Here's another example of trying to move on in a difficult situation. I'm in line at a local grocer. The man in front of me has eleven items, and I have but three items, yet this is the "10 Items or Less" checkout aisle. I grab all of his items and toss them in different directions away from the counter, some even breaking and spilling out its contents onto the recently waxed floor. Of course, instead of just accepting that he was wrong and "moving on," as we are trying to encourage, he decides that attempting to take up my very busy afternoon with angry words will fix his problem. And because I am in quite a hurry, I am ready to move on with my own life, so I spray him in the face with half a can of mace. Thus ending my current problem, I am ready to move on with the next obstacle in my life. How will I be paying? Credit Card. Will I need more mace soon? Yes, but I will get it on my next trip to the grocer.

And it can be that simple for you, too. Problems can and will happen anywhere anytime, and you have to be with the program or against it. And let me tell you, if you are against the program, then there's two things you need to know: 1)Enjoy, at age 50, wasting your time staring into a mirror deciding why your life was a waste rather than, at age 50, accepting that your life was a waste and then going out for a smoothie or window shopping for a buck knife. 2)I've said what I've said, and I'm not gonna let you waste my time trying to convince you otherwise - I'm done with you. Goodbye. See how easy that was. Now I'm ready to discuss other topics with you. Like celebrity gossip or Jack-O-Latern carving tips. And when I'm done talking about that, I'm not gonna beat a dead horse silly about it. Let's move onto the Hockey Hall-of-Fame or why flies fly around so damn much. It's that easy, folks.

This seminar is over now!!!